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December 20 If you're going to dream, dream BIG!It's my dream and I'm welcome to it!
Back in the mid '90's, I went into Stew Hansen's dealership in Des Moines, with some friends who were looking to purchase another mini-van as I recall. It was late at night, and I believe the dealership was near closing time, but I was bored so I went on a quest to find, Her.
Find Her I did, near the back north end of their lot she sat, an all black Dodge Stealth. What's this the door is unlocked? She invited me in to tempt me even further, so as to steal my heart and forever possess a piece of my soul. My buddies wife got in the back and peered over the seats in anticipation, her husband got in the co-pilot's seat, then closed the door.
Her theatre lights went ever so softly dim, ever so slowly so as to continue to draw some life force out of me. She knew what she was doing, I had been open to lustful ways and she was setting the trap, I was a dead man. I reached to my left, still in awe that this temptress was even still open whilst all the other car doors in the lot were locked and turned on Her lights.
Her brilliant lighted eyes flipped up, drawing me in closer and closer. How could I now ever escape, Her eyes pierced the night, even across the lot she was showing me the way. What she wanted from me I could only guess, but she was going to take me there, I had only to ask for the key.
The cockpit lights were all in fire red, just like I suspected her soul was. These are the very controls of a Milleniam Falcon I thought, what voyages would she take me on, if I were to just sign over my soul?
Above us the stars shown through the top portal, crystal clear, this was getting harder to walk away from.
She knew showing me the universe would seal my very heart of hearts, quickly I closed the portal.
The very wheel of this vessel had all of the bells and whistles, so as to prevent Her captor from ever letting go, of the leather wrapped grip. Like a velvet glove, She made it so easy to say yes, I must have you, I can't live without you, I'll never let you go. Soon She enraptured me with visions of places we could sail to on midnight runs along the ribbons of black sea.
The touch of Her velour seats hugged you, like you've never been surrounded before, as if to say, "stay with me, adjust me, bend me and lie with me forever, you'll always be safe in my arms". The longer I sat with Her, the more apparent it became, soon She would never let me go.
The lines between my being upright, decent and proper, were beginning to blur, from the mere whiff of her fragrance. My mind was spinning as if lost from this temptresses allure, all the while her essence was wafting amid my sinuses in this one last grasp to be so ardently sinuous. I fought off the notion to make any deals with her partner, Lucifer himself, by rationalizing at what cost would I have to endure to acquire this forged blackness of night.
I had to get out, where's the door handle? Oh this to was designed to be so beautiful as well, no matter I must leave and stand back, so I can look at Her for all that would be lost. There She posed, so demure, innocent and lacking in any devious intention, with Her lights still ablaze so as to continue to blind me with science. What lack of primordial instincts was I now without in my judgment? Had She succeeded in Her subsequent vexing me?
Nay I say, "I shall have no more of you, be gone one who aligns herself with The Prince of Darkness, get behind me", but alas she had wanton allies in her grasp, my friends. "Why don't you go inside and just ask for the key, for a test drive?" Oh what present darkness, is this what I deserve for coming to a car dealership at this nigh hour, for it is upon me now to come forth and make my stand, to just say, no.
Weak am I, for it was not easy under such provoking, to try as I must to bar my friends from becoming a party to such evils. I then muttered those regrettable words, "well I guess it wouldn't hurt to just go on inside and ask". Hope upon hope, they would say no, due to the late hour. Hope upon hope, they would see the folly in letting a person such as I drive Her off of their lot unescorted. As I stood in the showroom as nervous as a lust filled man could under the situation, continuously gripping my gloves so as to wring the last of Her out of me, for my own soul's salvation. A gentlemen from India, maybe a wiser man than I approached, maybe he has some sense to tell my friends, no the hour is late, I'm sorry.
T' was not the case, he merely turned to seek her key, he then asked us to wait so he could go and bring her around to me.
While I contemplated how a lamb such as I was being taken to the slaughter, for just considering such a ride in her, I'll never know. My friends ambled about the showroom continuously adrift of my plight, why weren't they aware, why weren't they going to hold me up, in this my hour of darkness. "Oh lord, let this cup pass from me, if it is thy will, I'll accept your demise, for my soul is now awash in my own sweat and cold blood". Soon the door opens.
Enter he does with a broken key, snapped in two. Would She not be for him I wondered and thus discouraged him from Her warm embrace? I looked outside, surely he gest, what car would eat a key in half and not start? What blackness indeed, but She was not to be seen anywhere outside this door's nightlight. He regaled the story of how he tried to insert the key and thought there had to be some mistake as to why it would not fully engage. Try as he must, her lock would not succumb to his twisted whim, not for him, she wanted me. I was the one who abandoned her and she only wanted for my soul's return. She must have said, "off with this key's head" and all that was of darkness obeyed her wishes.
There were apologizes all around, her whipping ring masters forebode a tale to me, that if I were to return tomorrow, they would break her and make her bend to there wishes. For indeed they were her masters and mind them she must, if the seduction was to be complete. My mind found its focus once again, I had been spared from making a lifelong mistake. For I knew in my heart, to return on the morrow was not be for me, nay I would not be tempted again, by such formidable forces as I had experienced this night.
I left with my friends as I had come, innocent and blameless for all of my weaknesses. As time came to pass, I returned long after a time knowing full well, that She had tempted someone else by now, someone weaker perhaps. Her masters regaled me a tale of how the next day they had found an Iowa license plate with magnets attached, behind her. Someone had been lusting after her more than I, I thought. True was the story that someone must've had gotten one of her masters to leave her door unlocked, so as to tempt the next one to come along, for it was to be me. Though these other demons wanted to steal her by using a cheap dent puller and broke it off in the ignition switch. They looked upon me with much suspicion and I held up my gloves that saved me from even leaving so much as finger print of sweat of blood upon her, so as to bind me.
She now worked another level of my senses, "had someone conceived to steal her from me?" "Damn they be, for the cretins ought to be brought to me and made to beg for there very lives", for I knew She would have it no other way. Yet they went on to say that once they fixed her ignition some young vice-president from Adventure Land bought her and has her parked inside the fence of their operational offices. Acting disinterested, I asked my friends if they would take me to Her grave site, for I needed to say a few words over Her before I let Her go, that is, if I could.
Reluctantly they agreed it was for the best, She had gone on to someone better, so as they twisted the knife ever so slightly once again. As I approached the fence, I was to look upon Her blackness not so much as an evil entity but a reward for this young man's courage to continue to return to a place of work so as to make the payments to keep Her in his loving care.
I continue on the other hand, to exercise Her from my lustful soul on a nearly daily basis. For every time I see a Ship of Darkness coming up the on ramp of a freeway, I pause to wonder, is that Her? Where She is today, I know not, but low She still resides in the darkest corners of my heart, that place where every man contemplates his weaknesses, "what if". |
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